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How To Make A Deep Connection With Clients & Gain Tons Of Referrals In The Process

I'm going to show you how to connect with your clients on a deep level so they open up to you more than with anyone else. When done right, you won't ever have to worry about falling out of rapport with clients or worse, losing them all together.  Instead, clients will want to renew again over and over with you and even refer new clients to you.

Before I tell you how to make this deep connection with clients so they completely open up to you, I'm going to give you the number one reason why they may hold back in the first place. And, that's fear of judgment.

Without realizing it, many coaches create a space that feels like judgment for their clients with this idea about holding clients accountable and trying to push them into taking action and succeeding somehow.

This can create judgment and put you out of rapport with your clients. Instead, we want to have our coaching space with our clients be as judgment-free as it possibly can be.

You never can tell where a client is coming from and they may be feeling all sorts of emotions already. They may be mad at themselves for not completing a task,  or not taking action. They may be blaming themselves for something, calling themselves lazy, or who knows what.

As their coach, the more comfortable you can be with whatever they end up achieving or accomplishing, the better the connection. The more you can make them feel comfortable with themselves for whatever they do, the better.

As coaches, we already have 3 big advantages when it comes to establishing that connection.

#1 – Anonymity

Most coaches by default are kind of viewed as a safe place for their clients because there is a willingness for people to open up just because they don’t know you super well.

#2 – The Phone

Most coaching takes place on the phone and being on the phone creates another layer of safety. You may have noticed what people will say to you face-to-face might be different than what they will say over the phone. It can also be different versus what they’ll write in an email.

#3 – Being Present

Another thing you bring to the table as a coach is your presence. The more present that you can be and the more in the moment that you are when you work with someone, the more powerful you’ll be.

Just being there gives them the space to just show up however they really are. Just being there for them in any given moment is very, very powerful.

Those are the advantages we have when entering into a relationship with clients. But… if you want to create a deep and powerful connection so they feel safe with you, here's how to do that.

#1 – Talk a little about you.

Sharing a little bit about yourself is a great way to help create a safe space for people. Be vulnerable and share your own weaknesses, or struggles, or how you went through something similar. With coaching, it’s, “Hey, I’m not better than you because I’m your coach. I am vulnerable too. I have weaknesses. I have struggles, and I have things that I’m going through.”

We want to use this wisely and the best way to do that is with the 90-second rule. If anything that you tell about yourself on a given coaching call lasts more than 90 seconds, you’re probably going too far and making it about you.

You don’t want to make it about you but on the flipside, to help people feel safer and more trusting is to let them know that you have challenges, that you have struggles, and that you have weaknesses. Being able to do that every now and then, will create a safe place for your clients and create a deeper connection.

#2 – You don't always have to have the answer.

Let your clients know that you don’t always have a patented solution or answer. It’s okay to start questioning them to help them find the solution for themselves or have a breakthrough. Never come in with the “hero” syndrome believing you always have to have the answer. Guide them in finding the power inside themselves.

Sometimes by just saying, “Hmm, I’m not really sure. Let's talk about it some more,” or, “Let’s look into it a little bit more” really works.

#3 – It's normal.

One other thing that will make clients feel safe is letting them know that what they are feeling is common. This is called normalizing. Normalizing takes somebody who feels like whatever they are going through isn't alone. When you let them know that it is common, it makes them feel normal. It makes them feel like there’s not something wrong with them, that this does happen a lot and that there is a way to resolve it.

#4 – Just listen.

Finally, to create a deep connection, just listen. Give people a lot of space to talk and be comfortable with silence. Sometimes silence makes other people uncomfortable so in a way it can make your client a little bit uncomfortable so they may then keep talking to fill in the gap. Eventually, they’ll start noticing that you leave a lot of space and they’ll start feeling comfortable with it. Also, as they’re talking they may discover some things that they hadn’t thought of yet.

Doing the steps listed above is the foundation for creating a deep connection and becoming a powerful coach.

These are all things to do after you've signed up your clients. But, what if you could start creating that connection ahead of time, before ever speaking to them? What if you knew how to reach deep inside your customers in such a way that they feel drawn to you and want to work with you?

Well, you can.

A friend & colleague of mine, Ryan Levesque has created an amazing marketing technique that helps you connect with your clients before ever officially meeting. It's a great way to shortlist your ideal prospects so you aren't wasting time, plus it makes running your business much easier.

I invite you to check out his method in this free new video training.

Here’s a quick recap of everything covered…

#1 – If you want to create a safe space for your clients, you already have 3 big advantages playing in your favor.

#2 – To deepen your connection even more with clients so they want to work with you and open up to you remember to…

  • Open up about yourself (a little)
  • Be okay with not always having the answer
  • Normalize
  • Listen

#3 – To establish a deep connection with clients before ever speaking with them and really create an impact take a look at this free training.

All of these techniques combined will be gold for your business!

There are tons of ways to create a powerful connection with clients.
What ways have you found really work?

Share in the comments below.

Big Love,

ps. If you know someone who could use this advice, please share!

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© 2020. Christian Mickelsen

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